Friday, September 11, 2009

Muhimbili: Payday! Payday!

I hear some ghosts are waltzing around the wards of the Muhimbili Medical Centre, busy doing nothing and just wasting the much-needed oxygen there.

I can take that. You see there are a lot of idlers waltzing in government offices, wasting time, talking hot air and consuming all that oxygen. What I can’t stand is that the bums are getting paid for it!

In its rare admission of government incompetence it has been found out that the government has paid money to ghosts. The ministry of education has 1,413 who have been paid serious moola – some Shs 3 billion shillings. Some guys in that ministry must be feeling very comfortable. That kind of money is nothing to sneeze at.

Even happier are guys in the ministry of health. Some 1,511 ghosts are taking it easy. Some Shs 4.5 billion has been chopped in the national hospital. I also can take that. That is peanuts compared to what the ghosts did to the Kagoda Investment robbery scheme where the country benefited with the disappearance of $40 million.

We must be a country of geniuses. How does the money just ‘melt’? Someone has suggested that the ghosts should be arrested post-haste. But there is something tricky here – how do you arrest ghosts?

One can’t see ghosts, although I swear I feel them when I enter most government offices. When your heart beats faster and you see those shifty-eyed looks from almost every official you meet.

Muhimbili boss, Prof Leonard Lema has refuted such claims about ghosts marching to his accounts offices and drawing salaries and perks. He asked the ministry of in the civil service, Dr (not yet) Hawa Ghasia to send him the names of the ghosts so that he can take steps to arrest the situation. He will have ghost handcuffs at the ready.

Now, anything can happen in Bongo. You could see names like Drs Kibasila, Mwaisela, Sewa Haji, Dr MOI, Dr Hematology, Dr OPeeDi, Dr Pediatrician and other distinguished doctors’ names in the pay-roll.

Others could be Dr I. Pullem (Dentist). This department must be also receiving a mouth-pong allowances to induce them not to run off to better paying jobs in Sausi. I hear some dead doctors are eligible for car loans. These doctors are never seen every day around Muhimbili. But their timing of being around on pay-day is legendary.

But you wonder how the government officers bless such ingenious ways of paying ghosts. Are the ghosts of Muhimbili, the ministry of education and Kagoda, in any way related? I think Tanzanians should be told. Because if they are, then Bongo is in trouble. We so far been cowed to submission into thinking that the owners of Kagoda are beyond reproach.

1 comment:

J said...

Adam in all honesty, TZS 100,000 is not enough for upkeep of the child. What about the boy's education? will he be responsible for that too? I hope so!!